Saturday, 5 February 2011

Mayn't We Indeed, My Masters?


David Cameron's Tory-LibDem coalition makes a great deal of bigger society and smaller government. Compared to New Labour's vision of a nation as one big-tent panopticon reformatory, with themselves and their hangers-on as a sort of screwy oligarchy, the Cameroons are not even talking the total toot on that one.

On the other hand, my poems have better scansion and smaller bathos than those of William McGonagall, and it will be a sad day when I expect to be carried shoulder-high through the streets because of it!

So what is their latest wizard wheeze to mend our State-spoiled society, as only its traditional owners have the nous and the right to do?

I know! Let's replace the traditional British May Day celebrations of spring, with a made-up festival of State-worship to cheer us through the blustering storms of October!

Kick the commons and lift the lords! Stop the dances and start the press-gangs! Down with cocks and up with cannons! Leave your lover and fuck the French! Kill unruly Spring, and bring the bloody Fall!

Oh, my country may bring you a Fall to sing about yet, cully.

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