Copenhagen's city council in conjunction with Lord Mayor Ritt Bjerregaard sent postcards out to 160 Copenhagen hotels urging COP15 guests and delegates to 'Be sustainable - don't buy sex'.
A cheaper chap than I would immediately poke fun at a woman who claims to object to prostitution, in the very act of welcoming great shovel-loads of politicians and their sycophants into her manor. Responsible persons, however, know that any attempt to liken the world's two oldest professions is both trivializing and offensive. It is true that both make their living by screwing total strangers for money - but only a genuine prostitute will take "No thanks!" for an answer, or leave most of her clients happier for the screwing. Nor is she likely to develop the delusion that all of them love and admire her. By the things my people swear by, if there were more respect for oppressed harlots and less for oppressive varlets, the world would be a kinder and a nobler place!
So it should come as no surprise at all that the organized harlotry of Copenhagen should be showing far more wit and class than its pompous civic pimpery:
Now, Copenhagen prostitutes are up in arms, saying that the council has no business meddling in their affairs. They have now offered free sex to anyone who can produce one of the offending postcards and their COP15 identity card, according to the Web site avisen.dk.
"This is sheer discrimination. Ritt Bjerregaard is abusing her position as Lord Mayor in using her power to prevent us carrying out our perfectly legal job. I don't understand how she can be allowed to contact people in this way," SIO [Sex Workers Interest Group] Spokeswoman Susanne Møller complains. "But they've done it and we have to defend ourselves!"
Myself, I can't pretend that I'm turned on by the thought of sex with somebody who finds me so boring or skeezy that they want compensation for it. Nor am I a big enough fool to delude myself that such a person would love or admire me really. But I do know where one huge bolus of professional bores, skeezes, petty domineers and rhino-hided narcissists is assembling, bulging-pocketed, at this very instant.
For those able and willing to cater to their very special needs, this looks like the business opportunity of the century.
Go, Little Mermaids, go!